past tense~

currently facing to my laptop...
thinking about the past tense in my life...
keep on questioning what i have done in these past ten years...
what was my favourite? what i was doing? who was around me?
it is really hard to dig out the memories...

grew up from teenager to a lady...
went through many experiences...
mixed up with terrible friends...
ignored parents advices...
but they never give up me...

thinking about my bestie Lina who went through these years together...
shared the same things, experienced the same route,
laughed and cried together...
feel gladful to have her with me all the time...

my life changed totally after moved into uni life...
a silent and slow environment make a person become different...
time to time went to the beach side of the uni and listened to the sound of wave...
watched the sunset with my besties in uni~

it made me became more mature...
think positively, try hard to be so called "good girl"
parents finally like the way what i am now...
i gave them too much worries...
finally i realized what i had done...

i restarted my life and made a reset button for it...
longing a better way will come to me...
put effort for my future...
luckily God is always with me...
He never gives up my and lead me to the brighter way...

think positively...

trying hard to think positively...
cheer up myself without doing any job...
hope k lay down at a silent atmosphere and think what is the next step for me...

how to cheer up myself???

lately it is so hard for me to smile cheerfully
wondering what is going on in my life
i wish to return to the past rather than having this uncertain life now
what is the disturbance in my mind
i lost my way, lost my mind, lost my interest

sometime i try not to think too much and try to think in positive way
however, at the end of the day still something disturb my mind
no one to talk to, on one to share of, no one will listen
stay alone and stay calm will be most helpful way for me

exhausted with the life i am having
no certain direction like what i have thought before
feel so tire and might dry up soon....

may~cursed

recently i am so blur...
i made many mistake and never be able to return...
i am too stubborn...
i lost something so important...
anyway i try hard to think positively...
i hope when time passes i will forget about the mistakes i made...